You can have the desire to be in a relationship that is significant and fulfilling and yet might find this difficult to achieve. And it could be you are not able to attract the right person, or when they are in a relationship with someone they connect with, ends soon .
There may be all sorts of reasons why this happens. But if it has become a way of life of that person and what they are accustomed to , it is not likely to be in work habits .
At first , it may not be visible and everything can seems to happen randomly relationship . However, if you want a closer look at what is happening and what is happening in your relationship , you start to notice some issues.
This cannot be immediately visible and may take some time to achieve . But if you want to see and agrees to have exactly what they say they want relationship, then the answers will come soon.
Challenge
Seeing these models in reality is not the best thing to do if , and this is due in part to the way the mind works. All types of allusions can occur and they can become someone distraction to see what actually happens.
Without pattern recognition , life is generally considered random spectator one is simple. And all this can creates a momentary sense of relief of having to deal with anything in the long run , a single victim and end feeling they have no control over your entire life or this area of your life, relationship .
Patterns
These models then play without awareness and that people who are attracted to and attract different , the same scenario plays out. So what is going on and the time it takes may modify, but what do you think will be the same, relationship.
Externally there are certain things that happen to be or do not occur , but basically , it will be some feelings. And it could be : abandonment , betrayal, rejection and loss, for example .
Thus, even if every relationship has different experiences , how you end feeling is likely to be the same. It\'s like being in a country that has the rain and go to another and it is always the rain, each place has a different look and yet still the same story, relationship.
abandonment
When this pattern is linked to retire , we can find that they get in the relationship and end soon . This could be one that is well and everything go to plan, then out of nowhere , ends, relationship.
Or you might not even get to this point and find that does not go beyond having a few date with someone. For example , they could make an appointment with someone for a second date and that person is canceled. It was after a connection has been formed and met . And not only the date is made, but not by the other person again, or if they do, it is as an excuse well built, relationship .
Maybe we do not reach the stage or being in a relationship, or even go on a date and the feeling of abandonment is then something that permeates all his life. Abandonment could be the way I have always felt and have no idea that life could be different relationship .
two levels
On the one hand , clearly there is no advantage to someone\'s life and creates pain . Intellectually, there will be confusion and it would not make sense either, relationship. But at a deeper level, this will be what is regarded as familiar and therefore safe for the ego mind .
The problem is that the ego mind probably formed these associations when we were young and over time became separated from these early experiences . So even if you feel like the world is out to cause problems eventually fall victim to what is happening inside relationship . childhood
For younger people who are vulnerable to feelings of abandonment , especially because their sense of connection has been attached to their caregivers. At this age, the decline could be a matter of life or death. And even if it is not extreme , it can still end feeling this way relationship.
It is therefore essential that the manager was very in tune with them as a child. This does not mean they were perfect, they were pretty good. So everyone is vulnerable to abandonment as a child , which makes is when you experience any kind of abuse or emotional neglect on a consistent basis . Even just out of the experience was traumatic.
impact
When was abandoned several years ago , on the one hand , it would have created an emotional experience or more emotional experiences that were painful. And yet , on the other hand, this experience would become associated as familiar and therefore safe for the ego mind .
This means that , although the experience was not healthy or functional , about the ego mind, which is what is essential for survival. Each idea and those that can be based on negligence, if it would change , one may wonder who they are. So all the time, these feelings are still stuck in the body of the person who will continue to create situations that reflect these early experiences.
These feelings can cause one to push the other at a distance and to behave in a way that will stop so you can feel abandoned again . This usually happens unconsciously well and if not get one they really want, is likely to feel comfortable on a deeper level .
awareness
To break this pattern and feel abandoned as a lifestyle and through experiences with others, we will have to release emotions and feelings that have been created in these first experiments trapped . Over the years , feelings , thoughts and other beliefs have also built on top of these original feelings and they will go after the initial trauma has been processed.
This can be done with the help of a therapist healer which allows to deal with their feelings and emotions and release . There are no playing time for this, some people may have more free others . And a certain level of trust must also exist to feel safe enough to let go.
A prolific writer , thought leader and coach , Oliver JR Cooper is from the United Kingdom. Your comment and deep analysis covers all aspects of the transformation of man , love , cooperation, self-esteem and inner awareness . With hundreds of in-depth articles highlighting psychology and human behavior , Oliver offers hope your advice. Current projects include \" a dialog with the heart \" and \" easy communication. \"
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